Category Archives: Potpourri

Drink of the Week? Flavoured vodka smackdown!

Posted on March 8, 2013 | 3 comments

I must start this post with a disclaimer: I do not like flavoured vodka. And yet, I keep finding myself in possession of mini bottles of it. This past weekend, for example, the swag bags from a corporate event I attended included no less that four bottles of UV Cake vodka. Yes, the vodka people have decided that it’s not enough to wreck the spirit with hints of bacon, cotton candy, salmon or even bubble gum, they have to push it beyond redemption by bottling it with a chemical flavour that approximates white cake.

Not one to let even the unworthiest booze go to waste, I set about searching the liquor cabinet for more flavoured vodkas because an idea was percolating: a flavoured vodka smackdown! Over the years I have collected many mini bottles (please note I do not pilfer hotel minibars or the airplane trolley for them; they arrive in the form of free samples or swag) including a mini of Skyy Infusions Grape, Smirnoff Grape and Absolut Orient Apple.

I decided to pit orient apple against cake, and sought out recipes that would highlight the charms of each, so it would be a fair competition.

It's Absolut Orient Apple vs. UV Cake vodka (the UV stands for "utterly vile").

It’s Absolut Orient Apple vs. UV Cake vodka (UV stands for “utterly vile”).

Evidently the folks who cooked up UV Cake (and I use the term “cooked” because this chemical disaster tastes like it was brewed, Breaking Bad-style, in a mobile RV somewhere in New Mexico) didn’t realize it would mix well with absolutely nothing. Recipes featuring cake vodka include a Cake Beer Float (mixed with root beer), Cake Dreamsicle (mixed with Sprite and orange soda) and Cream Cake Soda (mixed with ginger ale). Since we have ginger ale on hand, I went with the Cream Cake Soda (1 part UV Cake vodka, 2 parts ginger ale). I took one sip, vomited in my mouth, then poured the rest down the drain.

Absolut Orient Apple, which sounds infinitely more sophisticated than cake vodka (there was no bias in this competition), had recipes to match. There’s an Apple Crush (shaken with scotch, apple juice and Benedictine), Apple Vermont (with maple syrup and bitters) and my favourite for spring, the Absolut Ginger Smash (built with mint, lemons and ginger ale). The trick to this cocktail is in the execution. I accidentally muddled the lemon’s pith, which added a bitter taste to the drink, so muddle lightly. While I didn’t really like this drink, it suffices if you come across a bottle of Absolut Orient Apple and don’t mind wasting your lemons and mint. It’s also at least drinkable (I didn’t vomit in my mouth), and thus wins the smackdown. Cheers!

Far from a smash hit, this drink is potable in a pinch.

Absolut Ginger Smash

2 oz Absolut Orient Apple
4-6 mint leaves
2 lemon slices
Top ginger ale

Muddle mint leaves and lemon slices in a rocks glass. Fill glass with ice. Add vodka then top with ginger ale and stir.

— Recipe courtesy absolutdrinks.com

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Posted in Potpourri

Little orphan Avery

Posted on December 13, 2012 | 2 comments

It’s amazing how you spend your time when you have kids: Avery and I “enjoyed” a morning at Value Village last Saturday looking for an orphan costume. Her choir was performing two numbers from Oliver — Food Glorious Food and Consider Yourself — during the Christmas concert this past Tuesday night, and she needed to look like a street urchin from 1800s England. I pictured a child chimney sweep wearing rags, but I saw my vision was off base after the choir director e-mailed everyone this photo for guidance.

Cute, right? I’d adopt this kid for sure.

Just like English aristocracy, Victorian-era orphans looked smart. And evidently, coloured clothing didn’t exist back then. For some reason I figured Value Village would stock an assortment of drab, threadbare capris and vests, each for $2.99. Wrong. There was exactly one pair of olive-hued clam diggers, one cream-coloured turtleneck two sizes too big (orphans’ clothes never fit properly, right?) and two appropriate vests (Avery would borrow my brown corduroy newsboy cap). Not a great selection, but we took the items to a dressing room.

Little orphan Avery rocks her $10.99 rabbit fur vest.

The first vest, according to Avery, made her “look like an old man.” She was clearly gunning for the second vest, a stylish brown number made of suede and rabbit fur, with a $10.99 price tag to match. It was just the kind of coveted item that would have drawn unwanted attention from rival street urchins back in the day.

It looked a bit rich, but we were already pushing the envelope with a turtleneck (a 1970s invention, I believe), so why couldn’t Avery go all out and be a poor little rich orphan?

Clearly the fur vest didn’t go over very well with Avery’s castmates because she wasn’t wearing it when she took the stage for Food Glorious Food. Backstage after the performance I inquired why she hadn’t worn the vest.

The orphan choir — nary a fur vest in sight.

“They wouldn’t let me, Mommy.” “Why not?” I asked. “One girl said it was too nice and orphans didn’t wear that kind of thing.”

Sigh. Was it like that in Oliver’s time? Fellow orphans sabotaging his chances for adoption success?

No matter. Avery still rocked the songs and now we have a chichi fur vest that she can sport in Fernie over the holidays. I hear the poor little rich ski bunny look is all the rage this year.

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Posted in Parenting, Potpourri

Tagged costumes for Christmas concert, kids' choir performances, kids' Christmas concert, Vlue Village costumes

Bennett tries new things

Posted on December 10, 2012 | 1 comment

When Bennett was three the psychologist at his school created a social story for our family called Bennett tries new things. The book showed Bennett holding a hockey stick, trick-or-treating and swimming; in short, things he doesn’t do very frequently. The idea behind the story was that if I read it to him a lot he would become more open to doing things out of his comfort zone.

Eighteen months later I think Bennett has finally taken the book to heart (yes, change in an autistic child sometimes happens at a glacial pace). This weekend he hit three milestones and we are incredibly proud parents.

1. Bennett skied! For real, at Canada Olympic Park. Under the expert tutelage of COP instructor Eric Gerstenbuhler, Bennett got the hang of his French fries on the bunny hill. He still needs a lot of work on his pizza (it’s kind of important for that skill called stopping); fortunately he has another private lesson with Eric next Sunday. I am writing all about Bennett’s first lesson for Snowseekers and the story will be up later this week.

See what I mean about the French fries?

2. Bennett hung ornaments on the tree for the first time! We are so happy our little guy wanted to be part of the tree trimming tradition this year, though it looks like he inherited his sister’s knack for hanging 10 ornaments all on the same branch.

Trimming the tree.

3. Bennett had a conversation with Santa! He has sat on the fat man’s lap in previous years and suffered through the experience. This year, however, he actually answered Santa’s questions.

Santa: “What do you want for Christmas?”

Bennett: “How about a cookie?” (In truth he had spotted another child eating a cookie.) Still, it’s progress. Way to go, B!